Opinion
- Opinion
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Not understood? How is it ‘taken back?’
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White lies keep humans from extinction
As you’re sitting back this evening, taking stock of the day, ask yourself this question: How many times did I lie today?
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Somehow, heroes slide down lofty peak
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Feeling demotivated today? Well, enjoy it
Well, zip-a-dee-doo-dah, friends and neighbors! It’s another glorious morning; time for all highly-motivated, self-starters to spring out of the sack and go blissfully into another day;
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If it says ‘Easy Opening,’ be very afraid
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Mega-conferences will emerge in future
Having recently returned from a road trip, as you would expect there are sticky notes that serve as my memory wallpapering the inside of the Taurus.
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Sinister gopher threat gets washed away
On the final day of the Islamocommie Gopher War of 2007, I awoke with a sense of dread and of hope.
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To win a war, prepare to use all options
My fellow Americans, as heroes have learned throughout history: You don’t always choose leadership; sometimes, leadership chooses you and says, “You’re up.” At that moment, you must step to the plate and take your swings.
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Despite disguise, gophers are revealed
Last week, I launched into the tale of the “Islamocommie Gopher War of 2007,” a dramatic moment in American history that’s unknown to many.
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Memories of ‘Islamocommie Gopher War’
It was a morning like most mornings. The alarm blared. I thought about hitting the snooze button to sneak in another seven minutes of sleep, but I decided not to play that game and just got up.
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